December 1631

[Maid in Heaven]

First Voice: Good Evening, Madame. I trust you enjoyed the wedding.



Second Voice: I did, Kitty, very much. The ball, however, was a more painfully affair.



First Voice: Madame? Are you referring to the emotional pain of seeing another young lady settled in such an agreeable manner?



Second Voice: There is that but no, it is in the most literal manner that I mention pain. [displays a damage shoe upon her foot]



First Voice: [With shocked dismay] You do not say that your Gentleman trod upon your foot?



Second Voice: Would that it had only been once! I fear that dancing is one area where enthusiasm does not make up for a lack of skill. His missteps were not grossly obvious but expect there to be some mention in La Voix de Paris.



First Voice: Oh, Madame! Whatever shall you do?



Second Voice: Nothing hasty, I assure you but I shall be dropping hints that Madame Deschene has an excellent dancing instructor.



First Voice: I am confident that you will succeed, Madame!



Second Voice: I am certain that I will be if I can ever pry him away from military treatises and campaign maps to get him into Madame Deschene’s.

[A quiet observer]

A plain, nondescript Benedictian church in a Parisian suburb.

First Voice: Ah, there you are. It is good to see you back.

Second Voice: And I am glad to be back, Father.

First Voice: How long has it been? Half a year?

Second Voice: Eight months. But with the help of the Lord I have survived.

First Voice (chuckling): And you got some rewards as I have come to hear...

Second Voice: I have been fortunate, indeed.

First Voice: It is nice of you to come back here that soon.

Second Voice: I felt the urge to come here, to the house of the Lord after all these months. You have to know our regimental chaplain got killed during the Spring Campaign, so we barely had spiritual guidance during most of the time.

First Voice: So you wish to confess?

Second Voice: Yes, I do. If you wouldn´t mind.

First Voice: Of course. But after that we need to talk. Your mother has sent to me a letter which bothers me.

Second Voice (curiously): If you wish, father.

Steps, then a creaking hinge is heard. After that for a short time, silence

First Voice: You wish to confess my son?

Second Voice: Yes, father. I have sinned. And badly so. I have killed many a person during the last months.

First Voice: Why did you do so, my son?

Second Voice: Out of necessity.

First Voice: How that?

Second Voice: Otherwise I would have been killed. Or my men would have been killed.

First Voice: So you did it out of duty?

Second Voice: I assume so, yes.

First Voice: It is a grave sin indeed, my son. But you are exculpated by the situation you were in.

Second Voice: Maybe. But I feel still the sin to have reapt someone´s life from his body. Too often.

First Voice (sympathetic): Be assured, my son, that he whom´s life you have ended, will be welcomed in the Heaven, if he had lived devoutly. God has mercy for every of his children.

Second Voice: It is nonetheless but a small relief.

First Voice: i know, my son. So do pray for each of them.

Second Voice (with relief): I will, father. Thank you.

First Voice: May God guide you furtheron and...

Second Voice: Father, there is something else I want to confess.

First Voice (intrigued): Please, tell me, my son.

Second Voice (hesistant): Some... person has insulted me upon a worldly matter, a wedding present. Indeed this person has been quite insulting. And now I feel vengeful.

First Voice: It is only understandable, that your feelings tend towards revenge.

Second Voice: Maybe... but I feel something else behind these insults. It was out of nowhere. We haven´t even been introduced to each other so he has no reason to hold any personal grudge against me.

First Voice: That seems odd, indeed. Go on.

Second Voice: You remember Monsieur Chatries? When you were canon in Avranches? The abbot of Mont-Saint-Michel had to exorcise the devil from him, so at least his soul could be saved.

First Voice (stricken with grief): Yes, I do remember. Fortunately I have never witnessed anything alike again.

Second Voice: Could it be... I mean... I have no other explanation for this person´s behaviour. And I am very sure not to have given him cause for his insulting behaviour.

First Voice: I cannot say for sure. And I don´t want to jump to a conclusion.

Second Voice: What can I do?

First Voice: You could bring it to the holy inquisition.

Second Voice: You think so?

First Voice: They are trained to recognize if someone is possessed by the devil.

Second Voice: Couln´t you...?

First Voice: As a matter of fact, no. I learned from it in the confessional box. So my hands are bound.

Second Voice (sighs): I don´t like it.

First Voice (reassuring): I know about your feelings, my son. But it may be the only way to save the soul of this person.

Second Voice (more resolute again): Then I will do as you advise, father.

First Voice: Very well, my son. May God bless you.

Again the creaking of a hinge, then steps

Second Voice: By the way, I have something for you.

Scrooping of some silken fabric, then silence again

First Voice (surprised): A bible?

Second Voice: Yes. I came by after we reoccupied a small village with an old Benedictine Chapel. Ville de Bourge I think it´s name was. The priest of this chapel had been killed by the Austrians. The only thing we could do was to bury him on holy ground. And since the chapel had been mostly burnt down, I took the bible to give it back to your order.

First Voice (moved): Thank you... I will report to the bishop.

Second Voice: There was nothing else left to do there. I am deeply sorry for your loss.

First Voice: War often doesn´t stop at churches´ doors...

Second Voice: No, unfortunately not.

First Voice: Now, please follow my to my study.

Second Voice (puzzled): To your study?

First Voice: Yes, you remember the letter from your mother?

Second Voice: Oh, of course. My thoughts were occupied...

First Voice: I can imagine...

Vanishing steps, then a door is opened and closed silently. Some minutes later light steps can be heard, leaving the church...

[Private Ayes]

From the penny pamphlet, “The True-Life Adventures of Mssr. J.B.”:

Mssr. J.B. was enjoying a glass of wine at his favourite wine shoppe on the Outre-Grand-Pont when a ferret dressed as a waiter approached his table.

“The Commissar sends his regards,” the ferret said, placing a glass with a folded piece of paper.

“Monsieur,” the note read, “A citizen of Paris seeks to aggrandise himself at the expense of the King. You are to seek out and investigate this Emperor of Rome.”

Mssr. J.B. burned the note as was the custom and entered the streets of Paris.

As he entered into the theatre district, he found a company that was rehearsing a play with a Roman Empire theme. One of the actors, dressed in purple robes and wearing a laurel wreath, was storming about, demanding that the Christians be fed to the lions.

“Emperor Claudius,” one actor begged, “Your enemies are legion! They seek to ruin you!”

The actor addressed as Claudius launched into a long soliloquy about the wrongs that had been visited upon his person and his plans for vengeance.

Mssr. J.B. was about to turn to report to the Commissar when Count de la Bombast burst into the theatre. “You vile fiend!” the Count exclaimed, “You have besmirched my honour! I shall have satisfaction!”

[A Theatre Critic]

"Claudius struggled with various physical ailments including tremors of the head and hands, a limp, a runny nose and foaming at the mouth."

Sad, but does this explain why a certain person is such a poor actor?

[W+S]

(Two elderly gentlemen in a theatre´s box)
First Voice: Well?
Second Voice: Noteworthy.
First Voice: Really?
Second Voice: Sure.

First Voice: I didn´t find anything noteworthy at all about the play.

Second Voice: Of course not. You slept soundly about half the time.

First Voice: Probably not enough.

Second Voice: And I didn´t speak of the play. But the leading actresse´s dekollete...
First Voice: Oh, yes. That was noteworthy...
(Both laugh uproariously)
Second Voice: By the way, what do you think of the open air play they are staging in Paris these days?
First Voice: What play do you mean?
Second Voice: The Rise and Fall of Emperor Claudius.
First Voice: Oh, you mean the lunatic who is insulting every other person in town?
Second Voice: Yes.
First Voice: As an actor he is a mess.
Second Voice: Definitely. Last time I saw him near a stage he got banned from it. They even sent the dogs after him.
First Voice: Oh... that´s why he ran away so fast. At least one thing he seems to be good at.
Second Voice: But the author of the play seems to have some talent.
First Voice: Do you really think that´s the work of a troupe?
Second Voice: Sure. It cannot be real.
First Voice: Why not?
Second Voice: We just had an Emperor from Rome here in Paris as a visitor.
First Voice: Oh. I must have missed him.
Second Voice: Probably not. He seemed quite lunatic as well to me.
First Voice: Who was it then?
Second Voice: He calls himself pope.
(Again uproarious laughter.)